FOILED: A Nefarious Plot Against Iran

[Watcher In The Middle]

From www.slashdot.org:

High-Tech Squirrels Trained to Conduct Espionage

"In the July 20 issue of the Washington Post, columnist Al Kamen reports that the BBC has translated a story headlined 'spying squirrels,' published in the Iranian newspaper Resalat on the use of trained animals to conduct espionage against their country:

'A few weeks ago, 14 squirrels equipped with espionage systems of foreign intelligence services were captured by [Iranian] intelligence forces along the country's borders. These trained squirrels, each of which weighed just over 700 grams, were released on the borders of the country for intelligence and espionage purposes.'

According the story the squirrels had 'GPS devices, bugging instruments and advanced cameras' in their bodies. 'Given the fast speed and the special physical features of these animals, they provide special capabilities for spying operations. Once the animals return to their place of origin, the intelligence gathered by them is then offloaded. . . .'

Iranian police officials captured the squirrels before they could carry out their assignments."

1) A whole new meaning to the term "Secret Squirrels"?
2) How do you tell the "Gang of 14" from all the other average, everyday squirrels running around?
3) Does this remind anybody of the Nazi monkey in the Raiders of the Lost Ark (Indiana Jones) movie.
4) Borg squirrels?

Too funny - I hope...

[Dominique R. Poirier]

I guess it's true, and I found it.

[SWJED]

[Tom Odom]

Reminds me of a song....


100 Squirrels Will Train Today

But Only One Will Wear A Bugged Beret

Put Silver Chips in My Squirrel's Chest

Make Him One of America's Best

[Dominique R. Poirier]

JOIN NOW!

[Tom Odom]

In a response calulated to chill the hearts of Tabasco-loving Cajuns, Tehran is believed to have subverted the nefarious, nashing Nutria rat as a counter to recent Western plots to use Badgers and Squirrels as weapons of war.

The Nutria has long been an accustomed symbol to Louisianans since Tabasco magnate E.A. McIlhenny imported them from Argentina 1937. the Nurtria has long practiced the dark art of subverting populations to its cause. Sources in Argentina report that the Argentines found particular comfort when Madonna played Evita in the film of the same name because her dental work resembled a Nutria. No doubt this knack for subversion by the nashing Nutria was what attracted the Iranians to its potential military valua.

Congress--in an uncharacteristically proactive mode--has already responded:

Congress approves new weapon in the war to save marshes, a price on a rodent's head

By Glynn Wilson

NEW ORLEANS, La., June 2 — A Cajun joke making the rounds over the Internet goes like this. You may be from Louisiana if, you know what a nutria is, but you still use it as your baseball team's mascot.

But some folks in Louisiana and Washington are not laughing. Congress recently approved a new weapon in a domestic war, not a new gun, missile or surveillance system to fight terrorism.

[Dominique R. Poirier]

Animals warfare in the Middle East is trendy, seemingly.

http://neveryetmelted.com/?p=2757#respond

[Tom Odom]

It goes back for centuries, Dominique

People mistakenly thought Monty Python and the Holy Grail was a comedy when in fact it was an expose unfailing the threat of the Very Ferocious Rabbit....

Tom

[Dominique R. Poirier]

Tom,
I really enjoyed watching this movie as I appreciate English humor in general. Ever watched a hilarious English TV series of the burlesque (not to say trashy) genre titled “The Fast Show?”
I recorded all episodes til… I lost the cassette.

By the way, while reading the web page you linked I stumbled across this:

“When the problem of funding for the film came up, the band Pink Floyd came to the rescue. Rumor has it the band were such big fans that they would stop recording to watch Monty Python's Flying Circus. When the troupe needed money for their film, the band stepped in with portions of their proceeds from Dark Side of the Moon.”

I am a Pink Floyd fan since 1972, when I was 11 or 12 (the first album I bought was Ummaguma), and I didn’t know about this surprising anecdote.

Thanks,

Dominique.

[marct]

Let's not forget that the USMC has a long history in this area!

[selil]

http://scienceblogs.com/grrlscientis...ring_captu.php

n one of the more amazing stories I've read, it was recently reported that Iranian police jailed 14 squirrels -- for spying.

Yes, you read that right; spying. It seems that the fluffy rodents, who weigh approximately a pound-and-a-half each, were hanging around near the Iranian border, equipped with eavesdropping devices.

"I have heard about it, but I do not have precise information," replied the national police chief when asked to confirm the story.

Allegedly, the furry animals were equipped with modern technology including GPS units, cameras, and listening devices. The report also said that the squirrels were trained for espionage and information-gathering and are believed to have been sent to Iran by Israel. The original reports came from the official Islamic Republic News Agency (IRNA).

"The squirrels were carrying spy gear of foreign agencies, and were stopped before they could act, thanks to the alertness of our intelligence services," reported IRNA. "In recent weeks, intelligence operatives have arrested 14 squirrels within Iran's borders."

"The story is nuts," said a foreign office source.

"It is complete idiocy," agreed Robert Baer, a former spy for the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) who now writes .. what else? .. spy novels.

But even if this story is not true, animals have been used to spy before; For example, pigeons were used to carry coded messages during Second World War, dolphins were trained to seek out underwater mines, and even recently, dragonflies and moths have been designed as listening devices.

[Steve Blair]

They must be using chipmunks for command and control now...either that or Dave's org chart missed the FCU/SOC (Fuzzy Critters Unit/Special Operations Chipmunk) element.

[Watcher In The Middle]

Iran busts ‘spy pigeons’ near nuclear site
Dated: 20 October 2008

TEHRAN- Security forces in Natanz have arrested two suspected "spy pigeons" near Iran's controversial uranium enrichment facility, the reformist Etemad Melli newspaper reported on Monday.

One of the pigeons was caught near a rose water production plant in the city of Kashan in Isfahan province, the report cited an unnamed informed source as saying, adding that some metal rings and invisible strings were attached to the bird.

"Early this month, a black pigeon was caught bearing a blue-coated metal ring, with invisible strings," the source was quoted as saying about the second pigeon.

The source gave no further description of pigeons, neither their current status nor what their fate will be.

Link to Article

First it was those "Secret Squirrels", now it's the "Low Flying, High Spying Pigeons".

Well, if the Iranian government has a dinner special on "Cornish Hens", well, we've got an answer to what happened our "operatives".

Maybe the government is only going to allow pigeons to exist in Iran if they are properly religious. I can see it now, the "Pigeon Martyrs" will become a new 'wing' of the The Qods (Jerusalem) Force of the Iranian Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC).

[Ken White]

find invisible strings...

[Tom Odom]

Only the Iraniha could find invisible strings...

My wife pulls mine all the time...

[Entropy]

That reminds me of my all-time favorite Afghanistan article on the fearsome air-delivered tiger cats.

[Tom Odom]

So it was a slow day at the office in Kin La Belle. Stan and I had done an airport run counting tail numbers and had returned for lunch. The Marine at the front desk calls and says he has a Zairois officer--a Lieutenant Colonel or Colonel--who has urgent business with the US Defense Attache. We decide to bite and Stan goes and gets the guy.

Stan walks him in and I greet him asking what is his business. He immediately gives us the sinister/secretive look that is in the Zairios playbook under the heading, "shakedown."

He tells me, "Colonel I have absolute proof that the US invaded my country in the 1970s without permission." He then goes on to denounce said invasion and I listen. Stan has a look on his face that blends curosity, cynical disbelief, and a desire to bust out laughing.

Meanwhile the diatribe continues until the Zairios gets to it--if I will give him some cash he will turn over the proof and the US secret invasion will remain secret.

I ask to see the proof. He hands me a very worn copy sans cover of Michael Crichton's novel, Congo, which begins with a secret insertion of US Special Forces into the Congolese jungle. US perfidy uncovered again...

He left without cash.

Tom

PS

Maybe an SF Team sneaked in with the tiger cats? Too bad they didn't bring in Monty Python's Killer Rabbit

[AdamG]

Tehran's proof of perfidious American complicity - a candid shot of Langley's team, ready to roll.

[ODB]

Where do find more of these?

[bourbon]

Squirrel leaves Navy base incommunicado

Protecting American interests around the globe, the U.S. Navy faces a myriad of threats. From terrorists and anti-ship rockets, to mines, torpedoes and even ballistic missiles, there are plenty of hazards to worry the brass.
But here at home, one naval installation has discovered a new menace, capable of knocking out key communications in a matter of seconds.

However, this particular hazard doesn’t involve suicide bombers, long-range missiles, space weapons, or even explosives. Indeed, this latest threat can be found in most backyards, or any other wooded area. It typically weighs a pound—or less—and belongs to the Sciuridae family.

We’re referring to the common tree squirrel, and last Saturday night, one of the furry rodents disrupted phone service at Virginia’s Yorktown Naval Weapons Station. Four days later, “land line” phones at the base still aren’t working, making communications difficult.

Quds Force Squirrels are running sabotage operations in CONUS now.