Bacevich was a professor of mine, back when we were both at SAIS. He is probably the best teachers (or least the first among very few equals) I have ever had -- challenging, and willing to be challenged, and utterly engaging in the classroom. Really, phenomenal -- when I think of myself as teaching some day in the future, I imagine that I will channel much of what I learned from him. We've stayed in contact over the last ten or so years since I left.

I recall exchanging emails with him in the fall, telling him my husband was about to deploy -- he replied that his son was about to as well. We commiserated. I was very curious how he would approach this end of war and deployment, that it would have to be a very strange place for him to be. Just after the SMH conference, I emailed him, all full of piss and vinegar -- I happen to love the annual meeting of the geeks, always have a great time! In the midst of that exchange, however, my husband's unit (a small MTT) took some casualties, a Lt. KIA, the Doc seriously wounded, and a LCpl wounded. It was rather devastating, because the first two were part of the original team of 11. So, at the end of this very upbeat message I had started I had to include this paragraph about what had happened -- it would have been very strange to send the message as originally written. It's always been my academic/scholarly desire to know and understand as much about war and combatants as possible, but after getting caught up in all that attends the reality of such an event, I wrote: "Oh boy, I didn't actually want to know _this_ much." I mention all of this, because his consoling message came back to me the Thursday before his son was killed. Truly surreal.

I had the chance to travel to Mass. for the wake. It was quite difficult to do the same terrible thing for the second time in three weeks, to stand beside another casket holding so much wasted promise, but it's also the sort of thing you can't _not_ do either. After the first one, I learned how important it is to the grieving family for people to show up. It's truly humbling when such a small gesture as that is met with such gratitude. And, because I had not had a chance to do so at the previous funeral, but had been amazed at their turnout, I took a moment to thank the police officers, who take such care to come out for their "cousins in arms" at these times.

I'd like to get off the casualty circuit, but I won't get my hopes up.