I can -- regrettably and unfortunately -- broadly agree with you. I could quibble about the edges but your essential point is correct. The governments and the institutional Armed Forces of both the UK and US are excessively hidebound and bureaucratic and have not served their citizens or their Forces members at all well.

In defense of those forces and the people in them, they are reflections of the society from which they spring. Thus I'm inclined to fault the governmental milieu and the total populace a bit more than you but there is little question that the Force's approach has been poorly chosen even in view of the admittedly limited discretion they have. The institutional Forces did not foresee the pitfalls clearly. The fact that many senior people did not know what they were getting into due to doctrinal, educational and training errors of omission by their predecessors is a sad excuse, more so because in the US (and I expect also in the UK) there were Force members who cautioned against many aspects of the effort. Regardless, the senior leaders almost certainly did not speak up as forthrightly and strongly as they should have before the decisions to deploy were made.

Thus it is indeed a self inflicted wound -- and the fact they had a lot of help and were directed to do something is not much solace. The other fact, that both Forces had and have historically induced limitations, may provide the reasons for many things but it provides little to no excuse.

Sclerosis is a pain. Political correctness is more than an annoyance...